Grieving as
Housecleaning
"The gifts of grieving have been many - the most precious being our
granddaughter, Alexis Madeline."
The above quote is from my book, Grief Denied A Vietnam Widow's Story.
www.griefdenied.com
Our culture makes it so hard to grieve. We often have to fall apart
physically, psychically or spiritually in order to address our grief.
Grieving is an opportunity to clean up old, old stuff - the "attic" or
"basement" of our beings so we can move ahead with greater lightness, space and
joy.
We need to grieve throughout our living-dying process to keep cleansing and
clearing ourselves. If we can't, we're liable to walk through the whole
experience of our lives numb from the strain of holding our feelings in. When we
become so full of sadness that we can't hold it anymore, we close our
hearts.
As someone who lived many years with a closed heart, I wouldn't recommend
living that way. The odd part is how this is all hooked up with God.
Living all those years without any sort of God in my life was very
challenging. I look back now at all the struggles and I think it would have been
so much easier if I had fallen apart sooner. But I couldn't fall apart until I
did.
A couple books I highly recommend in addition to my own memoir, Grief Denied
A Vietnam Widow's Story are: When Things Fall Apart - Heart Advice for Difficult
Times by Pema Chodron and Tear Soup by Pat Schwiebert and Chuck
Deklyen
